{Aaaaaah-Choooo}

Currently I have a cold... one of my symptoms being sneezing.
Today I vacuumed drywall dust up... the sneezing got worse.
Sneezing with sciatica is worse than being hit by a speeding school bus.

Incase you're confused, here's a visual:

1. Sneeze.
2. Yelp in pain.
3. Cry a little.
4. Pee a little.

I may officially be the bitchiest woman in the world. 

{Bad Baby Dragon!}

Ugh. The last 24 hours have been pretty lame. I'll make a long story short and skip the gory details but here's a quick update:

I went to the doctor's yesterday morning for my weekly appointment.

Weight: down from 2 weeks ago but doc said that can be normal in the last weeks.
Tummy: still measuring 3 weeks (33weeks instead of 36) behind but it's consistent with how it's always been my entire pregnancy so that's not an issue either.
Blood Pressure: excellent - as per usual.
Heartbeat: roughly 70 bmp.. regularly between 140-155 bmp... not ideal and definitely cause for concern.
Cervix: 1cm dilated, soft and 70% effaced.
Post-check bleeding: Lots.. unusual and also not ideal - cause for concern.

Basically, baby's heart rate was super low and I started bleeding rather significantly so I was told to go immediately to L&D at the hospital. Upon arrival I was hooked up to machines, monitored, had my vitals and blood taken and all was fine. Her heart rate went back up to normal and stayed that way. No explanation as to why it was so low in the first place. They kept me overnight because of my bleeding and wanted it to stop before they let me go home. It's still slightly there but not enough for them to keep me longer so back home I am.
I'm very crampy and uncomfortable so I have my fingers crossed that this baby will soon be here. I know it's wishful thinking as I now have basically nothing to help me progress - I can't walk because of my sciatic nerve, and I've been banished from sex.. awesome. I'm going to be pregnant forever at this rate!!!

Now onto the fun stuff.. or not (?)..
Maternity was full when we arrived. Babies were just born and some were on their way..
One of my besties, R, brought me homemade cookies and we sat and visited. While visiting a lady started SCREAMING in agony. She was moaning, grunting, yelling, squealing.. it was pretty terrifying. We got the pleasure of listening to her give birth for about 25 minutes and then, after one more big scream, there was a little scream... her baby ! I almost cried.. it was so cute. Brand.new.baby.cry. <3 LOVE it.

As awesome as it was to hear that first cry - I officially do not want to give birth. Ever.

Is it too late to back out now? ha.

{10 Things}

10 things I have learned from being pregnant... 

1. People think it's okay to ask you personal questions they would not normally ask you. ie: how much weight have you gained? have your boobs grown? how's your love life? (you get the drift..)
2. Apparently it's okay for random strangers to rub your belly whenever they please and without any notice at all.
3. If you look young, old people assume you are. This automatically means you are a single, pregnant teenager who is using their tax dollars in the form of your welfare cheque. They will give you dirty looks and some may even say rude things to you. (Hey lady, just because you were born in the 1800's doesn't give you the right to judge me - and for the record, I'M MARRIED and I work for my money.. or at least my husband does!!).
4. You will hear TERRIBLE labor & delivery stories from anyone who has one. I'm not sure why it's necessary to tell a woman who is 9 months pregnant that after a 45 hour labor you had to have an emergency c-section, your baby wasn't breathing, and you ended up needing a blood transfusion. I guess it's justified as long as you end the story with "but that's just my story, I'm sure your labor will be much easier"... thanks for the reassurance, Asshole.
5. Epidural vs. Natural. BIG topic. People will push their opinions on you and judge you for what you plan to do. If they've had an epidural they would "highly recommend it" and "are so glad they got it" or tell you that "it made recovery a breeze!"... if they went natural then they would "highly recommend it" and "are so glad they didn't get an epidural" or they'll tell you that "the recovery was so easy". Thanks for your input but I will do what I need to do when it comes down to it. 
6. Most of the time you will have to pee a lot and it will feel like you spend half your day in the bathroom. Having said that, sometimes you will pee a little... in your pants. 
7. Acid reflux, indigestion and heartburn... that is all.
8. Hormones are fucked. You will feel like a crazy person, you will do crazy things and be well aware that you are acting irrational and crazy, but that doesn't matter. If somebody points out that you're acting like a crazy person, you will go crazier. You will cry.. randomly and sometimes for no reason at all. 
9. You will worry - constantly and about everything. Is the baby moving too much? Why isn't she moving? Yes, I haven't gained much weight.. should I be gaining more? Is that cramp normal? What if somethings wrong with her? When will she arrive? Will I be a good mom? Is my back suppose to hurt this much? Why isn't my back hurting today? Basically, I've come to the conclusion that I will worry about this little girl for the rest of my life and I'm okay with that. 
10. Pregnancy dreams are RIDICULOUS.

BUT...Even with the weight gain, swollen ankels, leaking breasts, weak bladder, sore back, restless legs, achey sides, bruised ribs, heartburn, indigestion, lack of sleep, acid reflux, stupid hormones, crying fits, sciatica, weird dreams, endless bathroom breaks, invasive doctor visits, constant worrying, ignorant comments, and endless opinions - you know it will all be worth it in the end. 

27 days to go... C'mon, babygirl!

{Operation Eviction}

I'm 36 weeks today. That means I have less than a month left.. 28 days - to be exact. I've decided that it's time to get this baby out. I've also decided that I will be blogging more from now on, I want to get back into it and now is as good a time as any. I apologize in advance for what will seem like one complaint after another until this baby comes out... I annoy myself these days so I can only imagine how annoyed of me everyone else is!!

So as I said, it's time to get this baby out - Operation Eviction has officially begun.

Let me explain. At 37 weeks you are considered full term, being 36 weeks I'm confident that this baby will not come before next week so it's safe to say that I will now begin doing everything in my power to make her hate it in there and force her little body out for hugs and kisses. I went shopping yesterday and bought the last of the things I needed for my hospital bag... breast pads - as if my boobs could leak more than they do already, some vitamin D drops - because apparently babies need those while breastfeeding, and pads (ugh!) - because as I'm told, I'll need those for weeks post-delivery. I also got some Evening Primrose Oil (EPO) because apparently it plays a wonderful roll in "prepping your cervix".

I got home, sterilized bottle nipples and pacifiers.. picked out a couple outfits for The Dragon, and packed a good portion of our "hospital bag". I feel like I overpacked (and I probably did) but at least I know I'll have everything I need! I then climbed into bed and proceeded to force 2 capsules of EPO up my who-ha in hopes that the cervix softening will begin (don't act like you're not excited!!)

They say the stuff in the capsules helps your body to produce prostaglandin, which is the chemical that helps to soften your cervix. This will not bring on contractions but will assist in getting you ready for labor (apparently). Fingers crossed it works!

On Thursday I have a doctors appointment. Starting now I have to go in every week - which is exciting! I've been informed that at this weeks appointment I will be getting checked! I'm pretty excited about this but I can say for sure that if she tells me that the whole "dilating" process hasn't begun, I am going to cry. I want soooo badly for her to say something a long the lines of "your 1cm dilated and 50% effaced.. labour is juust around the corner!"

Wishful thinking I know, but hey, a girl can dream.

(keep your fingers crossed for me!)