{The Bank of C}

So as I've stated before, I'm currently unemployed. In one breath I love it (!), I have time to work on my schooling (if I wanted to.. ha), I get to see C when he's not at work, and my house is always clean (most of the time). Another benefit is that I'm generally always available. If a friend wants to hang out, or there is a spontaneous outing.. well, I'm there! Sounds great right? Well it's really not as good as it seems. I mean, sure I'm available for every opportunity that comes my way but that doesn't mean I can afford to take part.

We're a young married couple doing it on our own, which I love, but there isn't 5 minutes that goes by where I don't wish I was done school and working my butt off. Having said that, C is absolutely amazing. He works full time and supports both of us and I cannot be more appreciative of him for that. He is constantly telling me to go shopping if I feel the need, or to go for lunch with my girlfriends if I want. He even comes home with things like my Wii because "I wanted it" (and I do love it!).. again, sounds great right? Yah, maybe if I had no conscience. I always feel guilty. I've talked before about how now that we're married "what's mine is yours" and now that he's been supporting us for the past 3 months, I'm learning to be a little more OK with that but sometimes it still gets me down. I definitely don't think that C thinks any less of me because I don't work, and I know that there may be circumstances in the future that require me to support us financially for a while so I try not to let it get to me. The bank of C allows us to live happily. We always have food in our fridge and gas in the car.. and much to my dismay, cancer sticks still hang out of C's mouth (although I'm certain those come before food anyways!). We can even afford to go out on the weekend and have dinner or watch a movie but unfortunately shopping is not high on the list of priorities. I'm okay with that 90% of the time but lately it's driving me crazy hahah Yah, this whole post was leading up to my unbelievable desire to hit the mall. So, because I cannot shop I'm going to make a list of 10 things I would buy if $5000 suddenly landed in my wallet:

1. New Lulu's - Mine are currently getting a hole in the upper thigh and the thought of not having them in my wardrobe makes me very sad.
2. A Camera - Like a really good one.. one that will make my amateur photography skills look amazing.
3. A BBQ - Summer is slowly beginning to show it's beeeeautiful face and I want nothing more than to have steaks on the BBQ.. and chicken.. and burgers.. and corn on the cob.. pretty much anything that can be cooked tastes better on the Q!
4. My Wisdom Teeth - I guess this is backwards.. I wouldn't pay to get them, I would pay to get RID of them! Those fuckers are starting to kill me... now if only the Dentist (whom I hate in the beginning) didn't cost more than my home's contents.
5. A Cat Condo - Poor bebe Charlie's scratch post is broken. It has been for awhile and it look so sad in our corner. The poor kid (ha!) loves that thing and I would love to buy her a new one; a big huge one. Those things are like $200, wtf!
6. An amp and subs - This one's for C. He loves his car and he loves it even more when it shakes the road when he drives by. His old Amp is broken and his subs really aren't that good so I would love for him to have new ones..plus, secretly I love a lil bass in my life (and even more, I love his smile)
7. Bathing Suits - yes, plural. Victoria's Secret here I come!
8. Photoshop for my Mac - to go with my new camera, of course!
9. Summer Clothes - not because I don't have any, just because I'd like some new ones.
10. and last but not least.. tickets to take my hubby to the Canada Gold Medal Game (I'm pretty confident!) Go Red and White!

My list was rather selfish, I'm aware. All wants, really no needs and basically all about me. The saddest part about it is that if I actually ended up with $5000 in my wallet there is no way I would buy even half of those things. I'm too logical and realistic for that so into our savings it would go.. a girl can dream though, right?